As pet parents, our furry friends bring limitless amounts of joy into our lives. They’re cute. They’re cuddly. They’re fun. They’re funny. They’re entertaining. They’re loving. We could go on and on…
We all have our weird little things that we do with our cats and dogs, like sing them songs and give them silly nicknames. But there are some things that pet owners do that are above and beyond weird.
Here are a few of those things that we can’t wrap our heads around, things that we would never do to our pets, no matter how harmless they may seem.
Check out these eleven weird things that people do for or to their pets. (Spoiler alert: kitten mittens are real!)
Making Them Wear Kitten Mittens
If you’re a fan of the show It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia, you’ve surely seen the episode where Charlie comes up with the idea for kitten mittens. For those of you who aren’t familiar, kitten mittens are actually mittens – little gloves that you put on a cat’s paws.
Guess what, people? Cats have claws. They scratch, and they sometimes destroy things. And putting little socks over your kitty’s paws is not the solution. Sadly, they even make a version for dogs.
If they can’t stop scratching the furniture, buy them a scratching post and work on your training techniques. Clip their nails once a week to minimize destruction or take them to a pet groomer every few weeks if you can’t do it yourself.
Putting goofy little socks over your cat’s paws isn’t okay, and we don’t support it, no matter how cute it may look.
Bonus tip: want to keep your cat from scratching your furniture? Cats hate aluminum foil. Wrap a piece of aluminum foil around the arm of your couch (or wherever it is they like to scratch), and they probably won’t go near it again.
Painting Their Nails
All dogs and cats have nails, but, unlike humans, there is absolutely no need to paint or decorate them in patterns and colors.
These Cat Nail Caps may be safe and non-toxic, but it’s a little bit too weird to even consider gluing what are basically press-on nails onto a kitty’s paws. The fact that they come in all sorts of fun colors and glitter designs just prove that this is more for the human than for the animal.
As we already said above, if you need to control your cat from scratching and destroying your home, there are way better ways to do it.
Dogs can’t escape this silly trend either – the Pawdicure Polish Pen is designed specifically for painting your dog’s nails.
We just have one question: why?
As cute or as cuddly or as fabulous as your dog may be, there’s no logical reason to give them a manicure. Ever.
Covering Their Paws in the Bath
Sticking with the topic of putting silly things on pet paws, we can’t imagine ever putting these bowling pin-esque paw covers on a cat. The manufacturer says they’re intended to prevent scratching and for use while bathing, which leads us to another question…
Why are you bathing your cat?
Okay, there are a few longhair breeds and hairless breeds that do require regular bathing. But the vast majority of cats bathe themselves and never need to go into the tub.
And even if you do have one of those breeds that require bathing, putting these giant covers over their feet seems like a really odd thing to do.
Putting Them in a Chastity Belt
We’ve pretty much seen it all, now that we know about the Anti-Breeding System for Dogs. This thing is basically a chastity belt for dogs. Strap this harness on, and your dog won’t be able to do it doggie style or any other style for that matter.
This chastity belt does serve a purpose – it prevents dogs from getting pregnant before they’re old enough to be spayed. But guess what? There’s an even easier solution:
Just keep your dog away from other dogs.
Feeding Them Special Doggie Ice Cream
Dogs are not supposed to eat ice cream for a variety of reasons:
They don’t digest milk well, it contains too much sugar, and some contain ingredients that are toxic to dogs.
So it seems a bit strange that people feed their dog special doggie-safe ice cream as a treat.
It’s understandable that you want to give your pup a special treat as a reward for good behavior or a special occasion. But it seems rather counterintuitive to feed them a pint of ice cream. If they start to think ice cream is okay to eat, they’ll be all over you the next time you open a pint of Ben & Jerry’s.
And since we’re on the topic of giving dogs treats on special occasions, we also don’t understand why people celebrate their dog’s birthday. Your dog doesn’t know it’s his birthday. Your dog doesn’t even know what a birthday is.
Our suggestion? When his birthday rolls around, give him an extra helping of his favorite food, take him on an extra-long run or walk, and give him lots of extra belly rubs. Those he’ll understand.
Giving Them Alcohol
Believe it or not, there are special “alcoholic products” for both cats and dogs. Why, people, why?
Your cat will never understand the pleasures and the joy that comes with drinking wine. Your dog will never understand how good it feels to drink an ice-cold six-pack on a hot summer day. It’s just a step too far for our liking.
The Meowsling cat wine is made with salmon oil and catnip. The Bowser Beer includes chicken, pork, and beef with amino acids and glucosamine to promote healthy joints.
Granted, these may serve a purpose in getting certain nutrients into your pet’s digestive system. But the fact that they’re made to look like booze just makes them weird.
Pushing Them in Baby Carriages
If your goal is to have a fat, lazy cat or dog, then by all means – start pushing them around in a baby stroller everywhere you go!
Okay, if you plan to spend an entire day outdoors in the sun, a baby stroller with a cover is a good way to give your pet a chance to rest in the shade. If your pet is old or ill or disabled or recovering from surgery and you want to get them outside for a bit, fine. For those reasons, we will absolutely make an exception. They even make pet strollers just for this purpose.
But if pushing your pet in a baby carriage is a part of your normal routine, it’s time to rethink your strategy.
Cats and dogs (and all animals for that matter) need physical exercise. They have legs, and they are supposed to use them!
And while some pet owners think it’s cute that they’re pushing their pet around in a stroller like an infant, the rest of the world is thinking, “why are they doing that?”
This is the perfect lead-in to the next weird thing on our list:
Treating Them Like They’re a Human Child
No matter how much you love them or how much they depend on you, your pet is not your child. Your pet is an animal and should be treated as such.
We believe that all pets deserve to be treated with dignity and given the freedom to do what dogs and cats love to do. And that pretty much means the basics, like running, playing, eating, scratching and sleeping.
It’s perfectly acceptable to find a sitter for your pet when you can’t be there for an extended period of time – we’re big proponents of that! But canceling plans, choosing to stay in because you can’t detach from your baby, and going only to dog-friendly restaurants is a bit much.
Don’t get us wrong here – we are pet owners, and we love our animals to death! But we’re realistic about the fact that we didn’t actually give birth to them.
Baking Special Dog Cookies and Treats
Dogs love treats of all kinds. They will literally eat scraps off the floor and crumbs that you drop from your plate. Treats do not need to be in the shape of paw prints or bones to make them happy.
We’ll never understand why people spend time baking special dog cookies. As long as it’s safe for them to eat, you can feed your dog any type of treat – they won’t know and certainly won’t care if it’s in a special shape.
Related:The 9 Best Grain-Free Dog Foods
Talking With Them As Though They Actually Understand
There’s no doubt about it – you can absolutely train cats and dogs to learn simple and basic commands and understand certain words. But if you think you can have a full-blown conversation with them, it’s not likely to happen.
All pets are different, so some may be able to learn and understand more words than others. However, it’s the combination of words and the tone of your voice that they’re really understanding.
Saying “no, don’t do that” or “get down” or “I love you” are things they may be able to understand. But if you come home from work and tell them how Sheila in accounting was gossiping in the break room, you’re not likely to get much of a response.
Dressing Them in Clothes
Dogs and cats are animals, not people, and no matter how cute they may look when they’re dressed up, they simply do not need clothes.
Want your pup to wear a bow tie on your wedding day? No problem! Special occasions require special outfits.
Dressing your pet up here and there is fun. It only becomes weird when you do it on a regular basis.
The general rule is this:
If your pet has a bigger wardrobe than you, there’s something wrong.
What Are the Weirdest Things People Do To Their Pets?
All pets and pet owners are different, so the things we do to and with and for our pets will always vary.
We’re not here to judge how much you love your pet or how you show your love to your pet. As long as your furry friend is well fed and well taken care of, that’s all that matters.
But there’s no doubt about it that some things pet owners do are just downright weird.
So the next time you put your cat in an elephant costume or spend your Saturday afternoon baking bone-shaped cookies for your pup, take a step back and think about it first.
All your pet wants is your love and protection. Usually, a few rubs on the head and a fresh bowl of food are all they really need.
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